It was the end of a fantastic day at the zoo! I saw a brightly coloured bird swoop past me, so I went to investigate. I followed him, running as fast as my feet would carry me over a wobbly bridge. Before I knew it it was dark, very dark and there were no people left in the zoo. I was on my own! Then, I began to hear some strange noises ...
Like grr and oo aa oo aa also some other strange noises when I went to investigate it was a black animal with sparkly yellow eyes shinin bright in my face I got scared and I couldn't see but the black animals eye was so bright it was lighting up the darkness
ReplyDeleteDid you touch the animal?
DeleteWhat did it feel like?
I got scared and frightened . What could I do I ran and ran as fast as I could I screamed as loud as I could. But no one could hear hear me as the animal got closer and closer I got backed up on the wall.
DeleteI heard a scary noise it sounded like a tiger was about to eat me with his deadly teeth. I suddenly looked behind me and I saw a owl orange scary eyes! With a lion roaring as loud as he could! The lion touched me I screamed my head of. Suddenly the lion eat me and I had a deadly scary death!
ReplyDeleteAghh, what a gruesome story Ise!
DeleteGrr ... I thought it was a deadly animal, maybe a cheetah. Then I shuffled along the spooky darky room. Then suddenly I touched a soft thing. It felt like wings. Then I saw two yellow eyes looking at me, scary like snake eyes. I turned and froze like a statue and tried to catch my breath. Finally, i ran outside were cheetahs everywhere ... TO BE CONTINUED
ReplyDeleteBut I didn't really die because I got a deadly knife to kill all the chetas.I then there was a deadly
Deletelion then I found a deadly metal stick. kill them and bash them kick them but all of them die but there
was a deadly animal in world that animal name is a dragon killed me for ever but the deadly will be reten
But it was a dream finally I went back home by Jakhir
DeleteI wandered what to do . There was no one around me. I heard strange noises. I was walking to the loo when I touched something hairy and soft. I stepped back a bit but the thing was still following me. Then I found some light and the next thing I knew was that there was a chimp on my shoulder. I wanted to scream, but nothing came out of my mouth. I saw the yellow eyes from the chimp . I ran as quick as a flash but the chimp hopped off my shoulder and started chasing me. I was trying to catch my breath.
ReplyDeleteTo be continued.........
What happened next?
DeleteDid you get away? Did you find somewhere to hide?
Did you hide in the Elephant House?
DeleteI found a house, but I didn't know what was in it. It was still in the zoo. The lights switched on when I touched something. I saw red evil eyes creeping upon me. I screamed but, nothing came out of my mouth. I shook with fear! The animal came closer to me. Then it whimpered to me. It was a dog. It didn't have a name tag so I made a name for her. Her name was Bella. When I first picked up Bella, I thought she was going to bite me, but instead she licked my face. We walked home. When we arrived home, I asked my parent if I can keep her. Guess what she said? Yes! I was so happy. Then Mum said that it had to stay outdoors. What will I do?
Deleteafter the hollday was gon I saw a creepy eyes. But I couldent see ennythink to grab on me and sundely felt somethink smoothy and coold.Then I herd a noise that soined like Grrr . finelly I rund away. then it chast over me.
ReplyDeleteI am looking forward to reading the rest of your story Chineme.
DeleteI went in the zoo then I heard a scary sound and I saw yellow eyes lighting up then I was trap like I am in a zoo.
Deletethere was a loud noise in the zoo. I wanted to go home but I was TRAPPED! I didn't know the way home by myself.so I went to the lunch room to hide and I closed the door as quickly as can be
ReplyDeleteExcellent start Shanika, now what happens?
DeleteOne day at the zoo it was dark and I coudn,t see. So I tried to shout help, but nobody answered. I tried to use my hand to search for something to hold on to, just in case something dangerse might happen. Suddly I saw two ginormus yellow eyes looking straight at me. I tried to feel what it was with my hands. It felt like a flying horses wings. Is that possible?
ReplyDeleteWhat was the animal and what happened next Emmanuel?
DeleteUm I released that it was a dragon with black further
DeleteI tried to run as fast I possible could but I couldn't keep up
beacuse my legs were killing me and I was out of breath
so I had to stop and catch my breath but it seems that the
Dragon was hunting me and have me for dinner.
When the dragon got me it took me a strange house it felt like being trapped in London zoo and it will never let you go when the dragon was all asleep I tipped toed to the kitchen and seared for the deadliest knife to stab the creepy animal on its week so it could never disturb me and make me sceard
DeleteThe dragon drag me up into a pot full tamato soup i knew i had to think fast I felt blue I had no clue then something shot me that shot was an brillant plan to destory this hoirrfing monster I attacked the dragon In it's weekness and ran to the kitchen. After I stabbed the dragon it was still standing so I charged onto the dragons tommy.
DeleteI was wondering threw the zoo when I heard something ganing up on me it was very dark I could not see anything I tried to find something grip on I felt like I was being watched I saw a shadow going as fast as lightning I saw sharp pointy teeth like a needle I touch something it was very soft but it was only medium sized it was a cheater I was terrified it was game over for me I ran as fast as I could but I was not fast enough it was catching up to me I tripped over a stone it bit me I went to hospital and that tort me a lesson never to get lost in the zoo.
ReplyDeleteChange your ending Hanson. The cheetah chased you, but you managed to slip inside the aquarium.
Deletewhen the cheetah was chasing after me I was terrified I did not no how to react I slipped over a stone .I was so scared I tried to reach to the other side but I didn't make it I was on the edge of a cliff I threw a stone on the ground to see how far it was it was deep.I think it is game over for me now .HE BIT ME I THOUGHT I WAS DEAD I cant belive it I m not going to make it I imedently took a risk and jumped off the cliff....
DeleteGRR... yesterday I herd a spooky sound! Clunk! The lights suddenly switched off and my heart raced. I saw two yellow eyes I was shivering there where no people in the zoo. I tried to find something to hold to. But there was something ferry and it was an owl! I ran as fast as could.
ReplyDeleteWhere did you get to?
DeleteA shiver ran down my spine. I ran with my eyes tightly closed, trying to find something to grip onto. Suddenly, I touched something warm. It was furry. Big. It growled. I froze on the spot. GAME OVER
ReplyDeleteContinue this Lopez. Game over I thought ...
DeleteI will
DeleteThen I woke up and I saw some yellow ice in the corner of my ice and then I got up and run so fast that I nearly fall and hurt my self and then I saw nothing .
DeleteGrrr...a deathly sound wisked around the zoo around. I felt so scared that I felt like screeming but I couldn't because what if the sound was a tiger so I didn't. I was so scared that I needed something to grip onto so I closed my eyes and I put my arm out and waved it around. Until I felt something that felt like a ostrist fether. It opened up its little jaws and...to be continued
ReplyDeleteNow what happens Aaliyah? Did this bird-like creature nibble on your hand?
Deletebut luckily it was only a baby bird that eyes glow in the dark and when I put out my hand it bit me and left a mark. When I got home to safety and went to bed, in the morning mum said'' do you want to go to the zoo''. I answered ''no way I'm going to that zoo again ''. Mum said'' why not''. I said'' because of yesterday that's why I came in late''. Instead we went into the seaside. When we got there we were having so much fun until...TO BE CONTINUED...
DeleteGrrr... a deadly sound rang out in the night. I satied to eat my figers I thot that there was a ravenous tager beaned me I thot that my lafe was over...
ReplyDeleteSuper start Amal, now continue the story. Think about where you are in London Zoo.
Deleteone day I went to the zoo at night. Even at the zoo, everything was pich dark! I tried to find something
ReplyDeleteTo hold on. Then I felt something realy soft To be continued...
Then I felt the lights on. Right behind me was a gorila. not just a gorila but a baby one...
DeleteKeep writing Maya. Did you turn and run towards the Reptile House?
DeleteGrr... a deadly sound rang out in the night, as I tiptoed through the dark zoo. I saw two yellow eyes like fire shing in the dark. As I got closer, it began to growl at me. It lept towards, I felt terrified and turned to run. I heard behind me the big cat breathing loudly. Then suddenly its sharp jaws bit into my neck...
ReplyDeleteMorris I really liked the way you have used a very good choice of vocabulary. I also liked how you used adjectives to describe what you saw. Maybe you can come and help some of us in year 6
DeleteWow this is really scary! Did you manage to shake the cat off and get away? How did you escape?
DeleteBecause I was scared! I didn't see the cat , it was too dark. So that's why I couldn't see a thing when I was trapped in the zoo. I was looking for something to hold on too, but I couldn't see anything. The sound was like a cat and I touch it's teeth and it bit my finger. I WAS SHOUTING OUCH then I ran so fast when it was following me.
DeleteIt was really dark everyone in zoo was gone . My hands were frozen. My whole body frozen . I really wanted to hold on something. After while I was a bit hungry. I felt a soft fur . THEN I RELISED IT HAD YELLOW EYES. It looked at me. I ran as my feets could carry me.
ReplyDeleteDid you manage to find somewhere to hide? Where did the animal go?
DeleteThen I stopped running. I turned around to see the animal ,but it was GONE. I started walking. After I felt someone. The person started talking to me. It said "come here my darling I have a really lovely story for you''. I ran to my mum came she started smiling at me.
DeleteGrrr... uh oh. I herd a creepy sound shivering down my spine. I was frozen on the spot, when I herd a swoosh. I turned around I saw GREEN BIG EYES staring at me. YIKES! It moved twards me, with its mouth open ...
ReplyDeleteYou've really built the suspense!
DeleteWhat is going to happen next?
I began to shiver and felt something slimy under my foot. The lights were off and I ran away, I looked for a bar to hold. Then triped on a stone. All the animals were nosiy, they were making a racket. I thought to myself im lost and I missed my family.
ReplyDeleteWhat was the slimy thing under your foot? What happened to you next?
DeleteThen I saw something swoop past me I was terrified I yelled for help. AAAAAAAAA.I heard a thing the tree swinging side to side . I thought I saw a monkey leaped strate at me. Later I had nothing so I sleped on the floor.
DeleteRAAAAA... a deathly sound echoed around the park. I suddenly turned around and could ent find something to hold on. So I searched and searched. Finally a cat .The cat was furry,warm,soft.So I holded on to cat. The cat was so nice I toock it home.But As I was heading home it was so dark the animals in the zoo started to make noises.AAAA,OOOO.I ran home.After that I finally got home.
ReplyDeleteyou could of put an ! to make it more exiting
DeleteWhat happened next? Did you return to the zoo to find the cat again?
DeleteI could hear terrible noises I searched for something to hold onto, I was so worried I thought I will never see my parents again. I touched a worm animal the animal sounded like a monkey or it could be a chimpanzee I didn't even no what it was because, I could only see a black background then I cept on touching the animal.
ReplyDeleteWhat did the strange animal feel like?
DeleteWhat did he smell like?
I hear a noise that sounds like an owl. Twit-twoo! It countinued again and again. I was so scared. All around it was starting to get very dark, I could not see anything. Then two yellow eyes shined at me. Something flew towards me and dropped something on my head. It was a bright red colour stone. It turned to follow where iot was leading me... TO BE CONTINUED
ReplyDeleteWhat was the bright red stone? Where did it lead you to?
DeleteIt was the end of a fantastic day at the zoo. Everyone had left the zoo, I was frightened. The zoo was locked up and it was pitch black. I heard a noise wolf howling and i was feeling scared. Suddenly I saw yellow eyes looking at me. They moved towards me then I gotr more and more frighted ...
ReplyDeleteWhat happens next Hakim? Who do those yellow eyes belong to?
DeleteThe zoo was empty. I tried to climb over the fence to go home, but it had sharp edges at the top. So, I went to wake the elephant up. I had a plan. He would break open the gate and we would both be free. The elephant banged the fence . Once, twice, three times then CRASH!
ReplyDeleteThen what happened Reo? Did all the animals escape?
DeleteRemember to talk about where you are in London Zoo Reo.
Deleteyour so on mr Highman they did escape I became the elephants leader then I CRASHED the London zoos animal cages so they can be free but then I saw that dragon with sparkling eyes,[which if you look at it freezes you into a stone], I had to sacrivice myself for the London zoo animals but the dragon never went for me it went for the animals noooooooooooo.TO BE CONTUNUED......
DeleteAfter the poor animals were froze my will was to never stop saving animals I saw that mighty dragon with lots of powerful strength flying around London zoo 'HE WILL REPAY ME` I shouted but this time he had dark gloomy eyes which power does he have now? I think it summons ghost dragons the next thing I knew was me saying 'AAAAAAHHHHHH! Yes this was my plan but I didn't expect the mighty dragon to have dark gloomy eyes` 'NOW I AM IN THE DRAGONS LAIR` now I can deafete all of the dragons! TO BE CONTINUED.......
Deletethe zoo was scary I felt scared at once but then I heard a grr sound it felt like a dark woods in there I got trapped in there
ReplyDeleteWho or what made the grrrr sound? What happened next?
DeleteI felt determinate to get out of the zoo . I felt elated . I ran by butterfly paradise and I felt trapped all those butterflies running up on my hand then I heard a bird sound then everything was all quiet and so my journey was just getting worse and worse until a gorilla tried to attack me those fearful creatures are out of there misery then I ran to tiger territory where they kept me safe and sound to be continued...
DeleteThen I hearted the bellowing sound of a animal making its horrible sounds it seemed like it was a CROCODlE I saw it's shinning black eyes. It tugged me then I runned super fast. Then I runned to the towering green gate but it was closed. Then it bit me in my leg the I screamed let go of me help please help! I was in seriousness pain but it runned away then I knew my hand was free so I called the ambulance I was rushed away to hospital and the police came whith the ambulance but the CROCODlE runned away to be continued....
ReplyDeleteVery good writing Tomisin. I really enjoyed reading this and would love to hear how your story ends. Will the crocodile follow you home?
DeleteNo it died because it had evil powers and if it bites someone it is going to die.
DeleteThink again Tomisin. I would like you to continue your story.
DeleteAfter the CROCIDLE ran away it was found in a muddy slimy tunnel it was took to a vet but it had a broken arm so it could not bit . But he knew that if he comes to me I will kill him . So one day a little girl was in the park playing with her friends.Then he came along and wanted to attack her but she put her hand out and lightning just struck him. Then he started shaking eventanly he died and he was bered as a meanful beast THE END.
Deletemiss Lawrence I touched it and it was swetting then a little water dropped down my back all the way down to my spine
ReplyDeleteWow your story is getting very tense. You're beginning to build the suspense nicely by not telling me exactly what it is you can see and feel.
DeleteIt was spooky and dark that night and I was shivering when I was shivering all the animals where sleeping and I was saying where's my mum and dad. I said in my head I've never been some where without my mum and dad before to be contined.....
ReplyDeleteBut this time it was different. All I could was animal sounds, I felt terrified it was worse than being in the woods alone. There aren't any tigers in Brockwell Park. So I acted like I did not hear any sounds and crossed my fingers. I hoped my mum and dad would find me.
Deletegrrr... I so a deadly eyes of shadow then I fort it was deadly lion but suddenly tuched some thing like softly like a
ReplyDeletewing in a softly of a pealow then I was warid what I was holding then I was shifering inside my body then finally
I fownd a door then there were more lion I diel but dealy will be reten of doom
Twit-twoo... As soon as I heard that noise I froze as still as a tree. Rooted to the spot. But then, I needed something to hold on to because it was so dark and I was really scared. I placed my hand on something, it felt really furry and soft, like a ...
ReplyDeleteWhat did you hear Amira and what happened next?
DeleteTiger. But then I thought zoos will never let wild animals out of their cage. So if it is not a tiger then what can it be. ''I couldn't figure that question out so I just placed my hand one more time on the soft thing, but this time I felt something really sharp and really pointy. Now I come to think of it if it is not a tiger then It must be a lion. NO but that is just stupid because a lion is a wild animal is well. So I had another thought but just before I could say it the soft pointy thing swooped me up into the air...
Deletei was in the zoo all alone suddently i heard a bab nosie it had yellow eyes and it was geting dark and dark i couldn't see at all no i wish i was not a animal not even humans beans so i cear fully follow the nosie it leaded my to a littlie gate i stop i contined over again and again no i must not follow
ReplyDeleteI was in the zoo all alone. Suddenly I heard a strange noise, I was so frightened that I could not move. I saw something that was black with yellow eyes. But it was getting dark, dark that I could not see I wish I was not a animal I hate being one. But I read my mind I "I would follow it'' but i leaded me to a gate very tall gate. i have to just be here.
DeleteWell done Adeline. What is behind the gate I wonder?
DeleteI was very scared that night at the zoo because what ever it was I thout it mite eat me.I ran parse Grillor kingdom and penguin beach also the silvery snake . I nearly got out of the zoo. But I herd a ssssssss sound it sounded like snake. To be continued...
ReplyDeletetwit twoow grrrrrrrrrrrrrm,I started to run as fast as I could I ran and I ran but then I stoped something was tangled around me it had yellow eyes it was green I started to think after that it ... aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. too be continued
ReplyDeletewas the strange noises going like this? kark kark kark! like an crow
ReplyDeleteafter the creepy beast with the scare eyes was waking past the woods then I was walking then I sore the beast was running as fast as I can then fell down a hole and the beast jumed over the hole I cuden get out out of the hole it seems I was stuck I hope to I can get out of hear
ReplyDeleteI ran past penguin pool, then suddenly, something got my attention. ROAR!! was the noise. I ran for my life screaming so I hid in the any threw any stuff I could find. I threw bottle caps at it.
ReplyDeleteA good start. Now continue your story Marcel.
Deleteone day there was a snake at the zoo and the snake said sssssssss and the snake looked at the person and he ate him but he was by his self in a big dark and it was so embarrassing and his family was not here TO BE CONTUNED
ReplyDeletewhen there parent's wasn't here the boy started to walk around the zoo and he saw a elephant siting on him and he was squashed in there body and after he saw a tiger sleeping he woke the tiger up and he started to run behind the boy and after he went to see the lion after he woke up the lion again but the lion was running behind him and the animal's was running all behind hum again but it was very , very , very really embarrassing
Deletearound me and got darker and darker until suddenly a noise came..." hey animal come over here let me take you to the zoo!" "UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HELP ME" I cried. but it was just a dream. one day outside at the zoo it got dark and it just looked like my dream from before...TO BE CONTINUED...
ReplyDeleteI was very scared that night at the zoo because what ever it was It had yellow eyes and I thought it might eat me. i ran pass gorilla kingdom and penguin pool. I nearly got out of the zoo. but I herd a crrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr sound. I sounded like a crow.TO BE CONTINUED...
ReplyDeleteI heard a strange noise coming from the tiger territory and it was reaaly scary. It was a strange noise and I did not really know what it was. I went to have a look. Inside it was really dark the llights were out but I could just see a baby tiger. I was scared because with the baby must be the mum ...
ReplyDeleteI realised I was trapped inside the zoo. I went to the tiger territory and heard a roaring sound coming from inside. I was really scared, was it a tiger? If it came out of its cage I might be his dinner. so I turned away and ran as rast as I can hear strange nossies coming. It became night time I didn't know where to go so I follow it secret WOW .......
ReplyDeleteAs I tip toed out of the zoo I heard a strange noise. I felt like a animal was coming towards me then I looked behind me and an animal was staring at my face .I feet like it was a dream, also I was so scared that my face turned red. So I rushed so fast to my house that when I got there my legs were so tired .I told my mum about what happened , when I told her she was so scared because something might has happened to me. I went to bed then I heard a strange noise again, but the next morning all of those noises stopped , and everything was fine and normal as what it will be always.jerome
ReplyDeleteI was trappted in the zoo I think some one was folloing me on the way like some one was persing at me then bang bang then...
ReplyDeletethe beast was looking at me and I was relly scard so I was running so fasf that I fell down and bush down a tall hell and the beast went back and I runed back in the coled night wind tride to get out
ReplyDeleteThere was a strange sound in the zoo, maybe it could be a scary cat. If it is a cat it could scare the animals. I think it is a cat because it was black with yellow eyes. Could he scare the tigers? Sometimes they scare the birds in the zoo. SSSSS! The strange cat can make some strange sounds when he's angry. I laugh when I see the cats talking to the each other and could be scare the first time ...
ReplyDeleteThere was a very strange thing last night with yellow eyes and black fur in the zoo. The black animal followed me to the shop and it looked very scary, but I carried on just trying to forget about it because I was trying to be really brave. Then I realized that it looked very familiar. A CAT!
ReplyDeleteLast night it was dark I could not see then I saw a bright yellow eyes it was scary
ReplyDeleteit was chasing after me I said stop,stop,stop and it did not stop it was still running
then more came then I find the gorillas kingdom I went inside and I shut the door
and I will not come out I will come out then they are gone.
How did you feel when the yellow eyes were following you?
DeleteI heard a loud roar and I got really afraid I did not know what to do.
ReplyDeleteI wanted to go back home but when i got my torch i saw i was
TRAPPED!I felt confused and scared because the mammal
was the one who was supposed to be in the cage not me.I
was scared because i did not know which ANIMAL was AROUND
ME! Suddenly i saw loads of YELLOW eyes and i did not know
what to do. To be continued....
The animal felt soft and very warm when I touched it. It made a sound as if it was hurt. Then, in the bushes a light shone and I walked up to see where it was coming from. As I got closer I saw it was a cat, a big cat. As I moved closer it grew bigger and bigger...
ReplyDeleteGreat, you are really building suspense in your writing. Now what happens?
DeleteI started to get scared and called for help. But I began to her a strange voice coming towards me It snatched my phone. I RAN AS FAST AS MY LEGS COULD CARRY ME I ran so far that I managed to find my mum there was no on there so I searched secretly what that creature is an d it said it was a type of man steeling reptile the next day I told my friends and asked if I can use there phone to call the animal capture compony and thought that I was going to be famous and it turned out that I was.
ReplyDeleteI't was a fantastic day at the zoo we was about to leave when I saw a colourful bird I ran to see it.Then the light turned off it was couplet dark I herd a sound at the back of me. I looked behind me a tiger I ran as fast as my legs could carry me...
ReplyDeleteSuper start Sylvester. Where did you run to in the Zoo? What happens next?
DeleteThere was a strange sound maybe could be a cat he isin the zoo he can scare the others animals could he scare tigers? i think is a cat because it is black and yellow eyes? bcause is the middle of the night and is a dark night and he can see with no light to be continued...
ReplyDeleteOnce upon a time lived a stunning boy and pretty girl one day it was morning then wiredly beacame night in a flash it was fretting it was black me and my sister used are hands touch.Me and my sister were trying to head for the bus stop. After a minute we saw two yellow wolf eyes looking at us WE SHOUTED HELP BUT NONE ANSWERD! it was no use we were helpless we had no clue what to do now but we never gave up until I had brillant idea and that idea was running as fast the wind could carry us ...TO BE CONTINUED
ReplyDeletethe wind was strong it was like if the wind was direting us were to go and were not to go i blind foded all the streets light were broken the only 213 streets light left are in the north and south west.what ever that creature was its horidesti cant even discrible it myself that saw it with my own two eyes.I ranin the dirction right and there was a little cabin small eughth i colud fit in but the monster cant i hood in the small cabin and couldnt stop stering at the window for 2 or 3m i was looking for the ugly monster that has been chaseing me to my death.THE END
DeleteLast night I can not sleep in the zoo something like yellow shadow
ReplyDeletelooking at me for no reason but I freeze like a trees but my mum and dad left me in the middle part of the zoo